~~~spoilers in tilde~~~
The following is a (paraphrased) conversation between a supporting and main character in the middle of final battle scene. Mind you, there is absolutely no lead-up to the revelation that follows. "We need to stop the bombing plane!" "Let's blow it up!" "We can't. It'll kill everyone if it's on the ground" "I'll fly it far away from everyone then!" "Okay but the bomb is on a timer"
At this point, some words manifested themselves in my brain. Words like "forced drama" and "asspull". I turned my palm upright and apathetically stated, "Seriously?".
My head turned to the moviegoers around me, expecting groans or eyes rolling, but saw naught but zombie-like blank stares. I gave them the benefit of the doubt and assumed they turned off their brains in attempt to salvage as much enjoyment as possible out of the $11.50 and two hours of their life they had lost. But alas coming here and seeing mostly rave reviews and ratings have proved my faith in humanity to be misplaced.
Wonder Woman 2017 is (or is supposed to be) a story of a naive but strong woman who discovers that humanity is not as black-and-white as a comic book is. She must journey to understand this trope and learn to use her strength to bring out the best in people. The movie begins with the titular character in her "naive" phase in a village isolated from a world in conflict.
About 15 minutes into this and the movie has already betrayed its own narrative. To begin, there is no sense of ease. Not a single joke, not a playful moment, nothing. It's all character conflict, hints of future conflict, or expository world building (tell-don't-show instead of show- don't-tell). This is NOT how you convey naivety. The potential for character development is ruined within these first 15 minutes.
In phase 2, the violence of the outside world stumbles upon paradise. Except it's not a paradise because we've only ever seen people arguing with each other. What could have been an exciting "awakening" moment instead falls flat.
Enter male MC. Almost immediately he steals the title with some innocent and light-hearted moments. The beginning looks even worse in comparison because now he's the naive one. What follows are poor attempts at chemistry between the innocent-but-not-really-innocent Wonder Woman (gadot) and the true star of the show (Pine).
Skipping ahead a lot, a ragtag team of misfits is formed who generally don't get enough screen-time to develop or be explored. One is a guy who sees ghosts and this point is never mentioned again. In the middle is the only scene with any emotional weight where gadot charges an enemy trench ending years of stalemate. As expected of the horrible script however, the moment overstays its welcome. It moves right into an attack on a town without any pause to punctuate the significance of the scene.
Skipping ahead again, there's more bad pacing and scenes without emotional impact. The ending is particularly terrible. ~~~The "big bad" who had been hyped throughout some scattered scenes is defeated effortlessly. As referenced in the beginning, Pine is the person who sacrifices himself in the end for the sake of a dumb plot-point. Naturally, you can't have a character better than the titular character surviving the franchise.~~~ A random supporting character is introduced as the true villain and some CGI magic occurs instead of some visceral man vs woman combat.
Overall, almost everything was bad.
The plot was terrible: twists or conflicts happen with little-to-no buildup.
The directing was terrible: scenes are poorly timed and paced.
Gadot is terrible. Of the few negative reviews here, most criticize her horrible uninspired performance, which is true, but then again how could anyone perform such a bad character? Pine is actually interesting ~~~but is killed unremarkably because he is too interesting. I wonder if the writers realized this. Why didn't they fix it if they did? ~~~.
The action was bad: while I don't really mind obvious CG anymore, there was a complete absence of visceral "human" fights that DC have had in the past, like when Bane is savagely brutalizing Batman with his fists and there's no orchestral accompaniment or CGI to be found. Maybe it would have looked weird with a lanky gadot beating down or getting beat by a villain. Then again you could have just got rid of her and gotten a better woman. In fact just get rid of everyone except Pine while you're at it.
Final rating: 3/10
*Note: I felt compelled to rate as a 1/10 to offset the fake reviews (by shills perhaps? Or maybe Idiocracy is becoming a documentary).
Action / Adventure / Fantasy / Sci-Fi / War
Action / Adventure / Fantasy / Sci-Fi / War
Diana, princess of the Amazons, trained to be an unconquerable warrior. Raised on a sheltered island paradise, when a pilot crashes on their shores and tells of a massive conflict raging in the outside world, Diana leaves her home, convinced she can stop the threat. Fighting alongside man in a war to end all wars, Diana will discover her full powers and her true destiny.
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September 14, 2017 at 12:58 PM